Saturday, February 21, 2015

REVIEW | Hot Tub Time Machine 2 (2015)


The Story: When Lou Dorchen gets shot in the dick at a party, 3 out of the 4 men from Hot Tub Time Machine travel through time to find his murderer.

The Facts: This sequel to 2010’s Hot Tub Time Machine stars Clark Duke as Jacob Dorchen, Rob Corddry as Lou Dorchen, Craig Robinson as Nick Webber and Adam Scott as Adam Yates Jr. The film sees the return of both writer Josh Heald and director Steve Pink.

My Overall Take on the Movie: In my opinion Hot Tub Time Machine 2 was a cash grab movie for the sole purpose of banking on a semi successful and semi original first film. This movie was definitely not necessary to continue the story of the first film and was a blatant “rip-off” of Back to the Future Part II. I put rip-off in quotes because the plot isn’t the same but they clearly took the idea of going to the future in the second movie from BTTF2 (The even reference Back to the Future in the movie), and executed much less eloquently. While it wasn’t the worst movie I’ve seen and I don’t regret watching it, it did not live up to the first film and it honestly wasn’t even that funny so it failed at it main purpose, making people laugh.

Things I liked: I didn’t really like much in this movie to be honest. I enjoyed seeing the characters again and I enjoyed the 3 main actors performances because I love the actors but I didn’t laugh much. I remember 3 distinct times I laughed and they were all call backs to the first movie.

Things I Didn’t Like: The story felt very forced and as I said before I think this movie was just a cash grab to bank on the success of the first but by the looks of it I don’t think it will be that popular. I saw this movie in a theater on a Friday night and there were only 4 other people besides myself watching the movie. The plot wasn’t very good and the jokes didn’t land, almost at all.

Rating: 3 out of 10

         Final Verdict: Save for Netflix if you’re bored one night!!!

My Favorite Scene:  “So that must mean you came in a Hot Tub Time Machine, Too!”


Monday, October 6, 2014

REVIEW | Annabelle (2014)


The Story: Hey honey, do you think we should put this extremely creepy doll in our soon to be born baby’s nursery? Annabelle is the story of how the doll came into the possession of the two nurses from the beginning of The Conjuring.

The Facts: Annabelle is written by Gary Dauberman and Directed by John R. Leonetti, and stars Annabelle Wallis and Ward Horton as Mia and John Gordon, Tony Amendola as Father Perez and Alfre Woodard as Evelyn.

My Overall Take on the Movie: I went into this movie not really expecting much, and to be honest my expectations were right. This movie just seems like a forced story that was solely made for the purposes of making a studio money. The part of this movie besides the actual Annabelle doll felt very forced and I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if this movie started out as a script about a possessed doll and some studio exec figured they could turn it into a Conjuring spin-off. I loved The Conjuring and thought it was a great movie so it was honestly kind of upsetting to see such a bad movie coming the some of the same people that made a movie I liked so much.

Things I liked: The only thing I actually liked about the movie was the demon. I’ve always liked that in the in James Wan movies he uses practical effects for the monsters and not just CGI, so I thought that was a very good aspect of the film. Now I’m not saying this movie was completely terrible, but it wasn’t close to being great either.

Things I Didn’t Like: The thing I didn’t like the most of this movie was the plot, why on earth would you put such a creepy doll in your house? Why would you keep it after a crazy lady killed herself while holding it? Why would you keep it after throwing it away and it just popping back up in a box at your new house? The scenes that were meant to be scary were never surprising because the camera would focus on where the scare was about to come from as well as playing music that would tip you off to what was about to happen before every single scare in the movie.  Also the acting was bad from everyone except for Alfre Woodard.

Rating: 3 out of 10

         Final Verdict: Save it for Netflix!!!


My Favorite Scene: The ending credits.

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

HARRY POTTER IS BACK! | J.K. Rowling posts new Harry Potter Short Story

  
J.K. ROWLING HAS WRITTEN ABOUT HARRY POTTER FOR THE FIRST  TIME SINCE THE EPILOGUE OF THE DEATHLY HOLLOWS!
CHECK IT OUT HERE!

By the Daily Prophet's Gossip Correspondent, Rita Skeeter.
There are celebrities – and then there are celebrities. We've seen many a famous face from the wizarding world grace the stands here in the Patagonian Desert – Ministers and Presidents, Celestina Warbeck, controversial American wizarding band The Bent-Winged Snitches – all have caused flurries of excitement, with crowd members scrambling for autographs and even casting Bridging Charms to reach the VIP boxes over the heads of the crowd.
But when word swept the campsite and stadium that a certain gang of infamous wizards (no longer the fresh-faced teenagers they were in their heyday, but nevertheless recognisable) had arrived for the final, excitement was beyond anything yet seen. As the crowd stampeded, tents were flattened and small children mown down. Fans from all corners of the globe stormed towards the area where members of Dumbledore's Army were rumoured to have been sighted, desperate above all else for a glimpse of the man they still call the Chosen One.
The Potter family and the rest of Dumbledore's Army have been given accommodation in the VIP section of the campsite, which is protected by heavy charms and patrolled by Security Warlocks. Their presence has ensured large crowds along the cordoned area, all hoping for a glimpse of their heroes. At 3pm today they got their wish when, to the accompaniment of loud screams, Potter took his young sons James and Albus to visit the players' compound, where he introduced them to Bulgarian Seeker Viktor Krum.
About to turn 34, there are a couple of threads of silver in the famous Auror's black hair, but he continues to wear the distinctive round glasses that some might say are better suited to a style-deficient twelve-year-old. The famous lightning scar has company: Potter is sporting a nasty cut over his right cheekbone. Requests for information as to its provenance merely produced the usual response from the Ministry of Magic: ‘We do not comment on the top secret work of the Auror department, as we have told you no less than 514 times, Ms. Skeeter.' So what are they hiding? Is the Chosen One embroiled in fresh mysteries that will one day explode upon us all, plunging us into a new age of terror and mayhem?
Or does his injury have a more humble origin, one that Potter is desperate to hide? Has his wife perhaps cursed him? Are cracks beginning to show in a union that the Potters are determined to promote as happy? Should we read anything into the fact that his wife Ginevra has been perfectly happy to leave her husband and children behind in London whilst reporting on this tournament? The jury is out on whether she really had the talent or experience to be sent to the Quidditch World Cup (jury's back in – no!!!) but let's face it, when your last name is Potter, doors open, international sporting bodies bow and scrape, and Daily Prophet editors hand you plum assignments.
As their devoted fans and followers will remember, Potter and Krum competed against each other in the controversial Triwizard Tournament, but apparently there are no hard feelings, as they embraced upon meeting (what really happened in that maze? Speculation is unlikely to be quelled by the warmth of their greeting). After half an hour's chat, Potter and his sons returned to the campsite where they socialised with the rest of Dumbledore's Army until the small hours.
In the next tent are Potter's two closest associates, the ones who know everything about him and yet have always refused to talk to the press. Are they afraid of him, or is it their own secrets they are afraid will leak out, tarnishing the myth of He Who Could Not Be Named's defeat? Now married, Ronald Weasley and Hermione Granger were with Potter almost every step of the way. Like the rest of Dumbledore's Army, they fought in the Battle of Hogwarts and no doubt deserve the plaudits and awards for bravery heaped upon them by a grateful wizarding world.
In the immediate aftermath of the battle Weasley, whose famous ginger hair appears to be thinning slightly, entered into employment with the Ministry of Magic alongside Potter, but left only two years later to co-manage the highly successful wizarding joke emporium Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes. Was he, as he stated at the time, ‘delighted to assist my brother George with a business I've always loved'? Or had he had his fill of standing in Potter's shadow? Was the work of the Auror Department too much for a man who has admitted that the destruction of He Who Could Not Be Named's Horcruxes ‘took its toll' on him? He shows no obvious signs of mental illness from a distance, but the public is not allowed close enough to make a proper assessment. Is this suspicious?
Hermione Granger, of course, was always the femme fatale of the group. Press reports of the time revealed that as a teenager she toyed with the young Potter's affections before being seduced away by the muscular Viktor Krum, finally settling for Potter's faithful sidekick. After a meteoric rise to Deputy Head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, she is now tipped to go even higher within the Ministry, and is also mother to son, Hugo, and daughter, Rose. Does Hermione Granger prove that a witch really can have it all? (No – look at her hair.)
Then there are those members of Dumbledore's Army who receive slightly less publicity than Potter, Weasley and Granger (are they resentful? Almost certainly). Neville Longbottom, now a popular Herbology teacher at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, is here in Patagonia with his wife Hannah. Until recently the pair lived above the Leaky Cauldron in London, but rumour has it that Hannah has not only retrained as a Healer, but is applying for the job of Matron at Hogwarts. Idle gossip suggests that she and her husband both enjoy a little more Ogden's Old Firewhisky than most of us would expect from custodians of our children, but no doubt we all wish her the best of luck with her application.
Last of the ringleaders of Dumbledore's Army is, of course, Luna Lovegood (now married to Rolf Scamander, swarthy grandson of celebrated Magizoologist Newt). Still delightfully eccentric, Luna has been sweeping around the VIP section in robes composed of the flags of all sixteen qualifying countries. Her twin sons are ‘at home with grandpa'. Is this a euphemism for ‘too disturbed to be seen in public'? Surely only the unkindest would suggest so.
Sundry other members of the Army are here, but it is on these six that most interest is focused. Wherever there is a red head one may make an educated guess that it belongs to a Weasley, but it is difficult to tell whether it is George (wealthy co-manager of Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes), Charlie (dragon wrangler, still unmarried – why?) or Percy (Head of the Department of Magical Transportation – it's his fault if the Floo Network's too busy!). The only one who is easy to recognise is Bill who, poor man, is grievously scarred from an encounter with a werewolf and yet somehow (enchantment? Love potion? Blackmail? Kidnap?) married the undeniably beautiful (though doubtless empty-headed) Fleur Delacour.
Word is that we shall see these and other members of Dumbledore's Army in the VIP boxes at the final, adding to the glitz and razzmatazz of a gala occasion. Let us hope that the behaviour of two of their younger hangers-on does not embarrass them, heaping shame on those who have previously brought honour to the name of wizard.
One always hesitates to invade the privacy of young people, but the fact is that anyone closely connected with Harry Potter reaps the benefits and must pay the penalty of public interest. No doubt Potter will be distressed to know that his sixteen-year-old godson Teddy Lupin – a lanky half-werewolf with bright blue hair – has been behaving in a way unbefitting of wizarding royalty since arriving on the VIP campsite. It might be asking too much that the always-busy Potter keep a tighter rein on this wild boy, who was entrusted to his care by his dying parents, but one shudders to think what will become of Master Lupin without urgent intervention. Meanwhile, Mr and Mrs Bill Weasley might like to know that their beautiful, blonde daughter Victoire seems to be attracted to any dark corner where Master Lupin happens to be lurking. The good news is both of them seem to have invented a method of breathing through their ears. I can think of no other reason how they have survived such prolonged periods of what, in my young day, was called ‘snogging.'
But let us not be severe. Harry Potter and his cohorts never claimed to be perfect! And for those who want to know exactly how imperfect they are, my new biography: Dumbledore's Army: The Dark Side of the Demob will be available from Flourish and Blotts on July 31st.

EXTENDED LOOK | Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)


Here's a new extended look at Marvel's upcoming (and my most anticipated movie of the year) Guardians of the Galaxy.

Release Date: August 1st, 2014



Monday, July 7, 2014

NEW POSTERS & TRAILER | Gone Girl (2014)




Gone Girl is an upcoming film Written by Gillian Flynn and Directed by David Fincher and based on the Novel of the same name by Flynn.

Release Date: October 3rd, 2014.


                                                         

Thursday, July 3, 2014

REVIEW | Deliver Us From Evil (2014)




The Story: What happens when Jeff Winger and The Hulk team up for a film that’s one-third a buddy cop movie, one-third a demon possession investigation and one-third an exorcism movie? I’m not exactly sure what you would call that but I can tell you that I would call it a bad movie. 

The Facts: Deliver Us From Evil was written by Paul Harris Boardman and Scott Derrickson as well as directed by Derrickson. And stars Erica Bana as NYPD Sargent Ralph Sarchie, Edgar Rarmirez as Catholic Priest Mendoza, Joel McHale as Ralph’s partner Butler, Olivia Munn as Ralph’s wife and Sean Harris as Santino a marine with a troubled past.

My Overall Take on the Movie: I went into this movie with no knowledge of what it was about other than the fact that it was a horror movie. What it turned out to be was a clusterfuck of random scenes and bad acting for the first two acts of the movie and while the third act is better that doesn’t mean its really any good. The story is allegedly based on Sarchie’s actual experiences while working for the NYPD but I’m a little skeptical of the validity of that claim, but this isn’t the place to talk about that. This movie, as I said in my intro, is 3 disjointed acts that all feel very different. The first is basically Joel McHale and Erica Bana making dumb jokes and investigating a lady who threw her child into a ravine at a zoo. The second turns into a paranormal investigation after they believe she’s been possessed, and the third act is an exorcism for the most part. The acting isn’t very good, with the exception of Edgar Ramirez and the direction and overall story is also pretty atrocious. This movie comes from the same director as Sinister, which was a very good movie, and this movie just doesn’t hold up to the standard set by that film. As reddit user “lastminotaur” very correctly stated in a comment section “the only evil is that that film somehow got funded.”


Things I liked: There were two things I liked in this movie Edgar Ramirez and the end credits because they meant that the movie was over.

Things I Didn’t Like: The acting. The terrible (almost non existent in the first half of the movie) plot, the terrible New York accents and Joel McHale being in a “serious” movie. He will always be Jeff Winger to me and will always stand out like a sore thumb in any role that isn’t a comedic one.

Rating: 2.5 out of 10

         Final Verdict: Save it for Netflix on a night that you have ABSOLUTELY nothing better to do.

My Favorite Scene: I honestly didn’t even have a favorite scene in this movie.

Mid-Credit Scene: No

After Credit Scene: No


Friday, June 6, 2014

REVIEW | The Fault in Our Stars (2014)



The Story: Based on the best-selling novel by John Green, The Fault in Our Stars tells a love story of a cancer survivor and one girl who’s still fighting with it. It follows the journey of the two lovers who are just trying to live their lives as if one of them wasn’t dying. It is a tragic but heartfelt film about what we all want in life, true love.

The Facts: The Fault in Our Stars is written by Scott Neustadter and Michael H. Weber. Directed by Josh Boone and stars Shailene Woodley as Hazel Grace Lancaster, Ansel Elgort as Augustus Waters, Nat Wolff as Issac, and Sam Trammell and Laura Dern as Mr. and Mrs. Lancaster.

My Overall Take on the Movie: I’ve been a fan of John Green for a very long time now, not because of his books but because of his YouTube channel VlogBrothers. I actually watched that channel for a long time before finding out he was an author but had never taken the time to read any of his book. I received a copy of The Fault in Our Stars for my birthday in January and read about 100 pages before deciding that I would much rather wait and just watch the movie with mostly fresh eyes, and boy am I glad I did. This movie is gut wrenching and also extremely heart warming. I was so happy watching it at some points and so extremely sad at others, and sometimes a little bit of both. If you enjoy a good love story then this film is for you. I could see this film being a very good date movie but not a movie to go see if you’re a guy and you wanna go catch a movie with your bros. This was in no way a bad movie but it was by no means a great movie. That doesn’t mean I didn’t thoroughly enjoy it because trust me I did. It is a very solid movie and I would gladly spend my money to see it in theaters again, I just don’t think its something you necessarily have to see in theaters to get the full experience of it.

Things I liked: I enjoy love stories and I enjoy watching them play out. I loved see Sam Trammell in a role outside of True Blood because he’s always been my favorite actor on that show. I really liked the emotions this film pulled off and honestly I had to hold back tears because I didn’t want to be the guy who cries in a movie theater, but a few did slip out. I enjoyed the entire movie start to finish and I only have one real complaint with the movie which I’ll get to below.

Things I Didn’t Like: The only thing I didn’t like about the movie, and it is EXTREMELY minor, is that in the scene where Augustus first shows his prostetic leg it was very clearly CGI and it look pretty awful. But any scene after that it looked totally real and I was okay with it

On a side note that has nothing to do with the film itself, the showing that I was at was packed and in some of the more emotional scenes the sea of sniffling and sobbing teenage girls really took me out of the movie.

Rating: 8 out of 10

         Final Verdict: See it in theaters if you want but for sure buy it on Blu-Ray!!!

My Favorite Scene: PG-13 movies get one use of the word “Fuck” per film. And when Peter Van Houton was being a huge dick and Hazel told him to go fuck himself, I loved it because it was very unexpected from this movie and it made me laugh.